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From Chaos To Calm: 17 Tips For Parenting Toddlers

Brian Comly

"Raising a toddler is like having a blender without a lid."

—Jerry Seinfeld

Raising toddlers is a rewarding yet challenging phase of parenting that often leaves caregivers searching for guidance and effective strategies. Toddlers are constantly exploring the world around them, asserting their independence, and developing their personalities. As a parent or caregiver, understanding the unique needs and behaviors of toddlers is essential to provide them with the support and guidance they require during this crucial stage of development.


In this article, I’ve compiled a list of practical tips for parenting toddlers. Some are simple (have snacks at the ready on trips), others require some effort (making a balance beam), and yet others are just adulting reminders (make that will).


Tips For Parenting Toddlers

  • Make a checklist. Kids love helping and having a purpose, especially around this age. Make a simple checklist (with icons instead of words) for your morning and nighttime routine and hang it up in their room. For example, make a morning checklist that includes getting dressed, playing, eating, taking a vitamin, and brushing teeth. Go a step further and laminate it and have them check off each task each time. They’ll love the visualization and you’ll love the time-saving aspect.

  • Encourage the word “yet.” Toddlers are very perceptive to limitations and other’s preferences. When they verbalize these (“I can’t do that” and “I don’t like that”), have them say the word “yet” after the statement. Since they are growing at an incredible pace, this limits a mental barrier to trying something or doing something in the future. This builds a growth mindset and repeatedly reminds them that they have room for growth and opportunity.

  • Birthday wishlist hack. If your child has a tendency to come out of any and every store with a purchase for themselves then here’s a way to put an end to it. Before going into any store, talk to your kid about expectations. Instead of buying something for them, encourage them to add something that they like to their birthday wishlist. They can add 1 thing or 100 things (which prevents decision-making meltdowns). In doing this, there’s no expectation to buy something, they practice delayed gratification and impulse control, and you get gift ideas for them for their birthday, Christmas, etc. Make a note of what they want and as the birthday approaches, review it with them to make sure that they still want it.

  • Make a balance beam. Even if you don’t consider yourself handy, making a balance beam is simple and gets a big ROI for the next few years from your kid. Here is a very basic one, here is a YouTube video on a more advanced one, and here’s mine:

  • Have a spray bottle and comb near the door. If their hair is long enough, it will get wild enough. Have a glass spray bottle and a comb set by the door for a quick “car wash” on their way out.

  • Make a will. A will is an incredibly powerful tool, especially as a parent, yet only 33% of Americans have one. One important purpose of a will is to designate the legal guardian of your child(ren) if you and your spouse die. Another important aspect of the will, among others, involves the estate. If you don’t have a will in many states, your estate can be divided between your child(ren) and your surviving spouse which could cause financial concerns. Here’s a step-by-step guide to creating a will to get you started.

  • Practice green light, yellow light, red light. This “game” comes in handy especially if you have multiple children, live in the city, or if your kid is on the fast track to an ADD diagnosis. Practice it regularly at home and then implement it in real-world environments for their safety.

  • Get a library membership. Head there on rainy days, ahead of a vacation to get a book for the ride, or just make it a Tuesday night ritual. (Bonus: download the Libby app and listen to library audiobooks with your kids on long car rides.)

  • Introduce your kids to breathwork. The practice of breathing in purposeful patterns is a great tool to teach your children. It can calm them, amp them up, or simply make them more present. Plus, there are many health benefits to breathwork. Start by using a video to teach them the basics of belly breathing or “balloon breathing.”

  • Always have snacks at the ready. On the other side of a hungry kid tends to be an emotional kid. Have snacks packed and at the ready in your bag, car, etc. My go-to is a mason jar full of nuts, coconut flakes, and mini dark chocolate chips.

  • Hit 1,000 hours outside. The website 1000 Hours Outside is a great site whose purpose “is to attempt to match nature time with screen time. If kids can consume media through screens 1200 hours a year on average then the time is there and at least some of it can and should be shifted towards a more productive and healthy outcome!” Head to this page to get a free tracker of the 10,000 hours or download the app.

  • Don't do anything for your kid that they're capable of doing. This includes activities of daily living (ADL) like getting dressed, washing in the tub, washing their hands after using the potty, and cleaning up. As they get older this will provide tremendous benefits in making lunches, doing laundry, and getting up on their own in the morning. Learn more about how to utilize “acomoedido” to implement this from Hunt, Gather, Parent.

  • Teach your kids to cook. Have them pick dinner for the night from a book of healthy options such as The Paleo Kids Cookbook. Aim to get through every recipe in the book as you make it a weekly tradition and a way to bond with your kid.

  • Model good character. This article of My 8 Best Techniques for Evaluating Character provides a great list of ways to determine whether the person you’re dealing with has character. Flip the script by evaluating and modifying your character and model it for your kid.

  • Teach sports skills. One interesting takeaway from the article, Should Kids Specialize in Sports, is that kids with the highest number of head turns in a game have better performance and abilities overall.  Use “this is your spot for this position” less and more of “there are two positions in hockey; with the puck and without so get to a spot where you can be with the pick.”

What are your favorite tips for raising toddlers?


Related: Guides To Raising Kids